It is 6 A.M. in the morning. There’s time when I just feel that I am better off alone. So much dramas and trivial shenanigans I don’t need. I guess the facade I am projecting doesn’t reflect my real alter-ego inside. I am not the angelic childlike everyone perceives. Opposite the ‘cutesy’ facade. Stubborn. Icy. Aloof.
My blog has always been my salvatory valve. This is the place where I pour mostly when verbal words are hard to explore. Don’t get me wrong. I love having friends and being surrounded by people and being splurged with attentions and loves. But sometimes I need my space and time to be alone. Maybe it is God’s Sign to say : “It’s time to bail out!”. I want to make the decision. FAST. Before it becomes fatal and killing my me softly. Maybe people say I am a freak for that. Maybe people say I am psycho-demented. Maybe people say I am an egocentric.
I never pay heed. I just don’t like to be forced to do what I don’t want to do. I have always been very honest to myself the way I feel or the way I think. It will be an injustice for me to do what I don’t want to do. It’s done. I am bailing out.
“Crazy isn’t about being broken; or swallowing a dark secret.
It’s you, or me, amplified…”
(Dialogue taken from the movie “Girl, Interrupted”)