I can’t sleep. It’s already 3.49 a.m as I am jotting this sentence. Why? It is about the future. And everything that will be affected like A Domino Effect. Crucial with so little time and knowledge. I am thinking about the possibilities of racking up the stability I have in life especially my financial; and that is a BIG decision.
I have been doing a little bit of reading and asking a few people about the path I could take once I have secured my Masters’ Degree but it seemed that it is impossible for me to have a win-win situation. I have already been in the Government service as a teacher for 5 years and with the pension scheme, my salary is getting more comfortable as per annual increment. NEVERTHELESS, if I were to pursue PhD full time :-
- I can’t do under Ministry of Education’s scholarship (“Hadiah Latihan Persekutuan”) as I am not going to do education-based course;
- Based from what I read about Fellowship Programme for UPM PhD candidate, an allowance of merely RM1,700 will be given & that is half from I have now (with all the commitments and housing loan??!), can I take that for 4 years throughout doing PhD???;
- Can I secure my eligibility for pension as if I were to do Fellowship, I would be detaching myself from Government service (quit) and a hiatus of 4 years before I am to be accepted to a GLC (in this case, the university I am about to serve)???
From a teacher;
To a lecturer.
Since I am pursuing Masters’ Degree in Corporate Communication, seems like the opportunity isn’t that wide; so far I have encountered universities such as UPM, USM & UUM do offer PhD in Communication but the rest are no cases at all. I feel so stress. Let say if I were to accept the Fellowship programme with merely RM1,700 allowance per month; HOW AM I GOING TO SURVIVE????
The blues! Big deal, it is!
I have yet to peruse the details in UiTM Postgraduate Teaching Assistant (UPTA) and this makes me think “How I wish I have picked UiTM instead although I had bad experience with the insolent rude guards??” – and that would make into my deliberating list. And I also haven’t refer this to my advisor in UPM which is Dr. Nizam. Probably he would have a better suggestion for me! I don’t know, maybe perhaps the thought of having Kakak flying to UK this coming September to pursue her study making me nervous as I have no one to rely upon anymore (although I usually solve my problem; but having her as confidante brings confidence as I know I;ve got cushion!)!!
I guess, we”ll just have to dig this matter delicately, study and pray for the right choice. Amin. Have a little faith, Shahrill!