Blog is my solace. It is the platform for me to transcribe whatever feeling I have inside. I just need to siphon it out – to keep my sanity alive. Sometimes when humans refuse to understand yourself, you resort to self-reflection and that is what blog has been doing for me.
At this juncture, I am feeling so stress and burned-out :-
- Stress : A pattern of emotional states, cognitive and physiological reactions, occurring in response to existence of stressors;
- Burn-out : Syndrome due to prolong exposure to physical, emotional and mental exhaustion as well as the feeling of lack of personal accomplishment.
Ironically, I am studying the topic for my Organizational Communication subject, slated to be tested this upcoming Thursday on the 1st Ramadhan. There are so many things to read with little time! Being a Kiasu me, I get freak-out! And having the school reopens is not much of a help as well (how I just love school holidays as I can concentrate on my Master’s Degree 100%!). Today on the 2nd day, we just organized an Open Day a.k.a. Report Card Day where teachers are to meet parents of pupils to discuss about the performance for the last 6 months. And that means, I have to be cooped inside the class from 8.00 a.m. until 1.00 p.m. entertaining and waiting for parents. And that means, I couldn’t study or focus although I tried to ‘steal time’ while waiting for parents.
On 3rd June 2015, I had my 1st killer subject “Theory & Practices of Corporate Communication”. Done with that, I had to focus on my Research Paper presentation (Chapter 1-3) on 10th June 2015 (REFER to https://undomiel84.wordpress.com/2015/06/10/my-research-paper-presentation-chapter-1-3-academic-discussion-on-malaysian-moslems-perception-towards-cadburys-image-repair-its-halal-image-faculty-of-modern-language-commun/) ; And then on 12th June 2015, I had my “Principles of Advertising” Final Exam! Non-stop, really!
And not to mention, I feel that my gums are throbbing now. Seemed that the Tonsil swells and the peripheral vein rooted from Tonsil has affected the veins on my gums. And of course, that comes with feverish state.
When it comes to Final Exam especially for this Master’s Degree, I admit that I am quite a controlled freak wanting everything to be perfect and ready before I sit for the exam. I loath the idea of entering the session WITHOUT preparation! I am so tense up now and blog is the only way to siphon. I am feeling feverish and wanting to sleep earlier tonight but I cannot sleep thinking about the “Organizational Communication” that I have yet to read thoroughly! So many concepts with stringent marking! That freaks me out!
I wish I could just be more relax. I guess I am feeling the pressure because I am competing with myself. I want to retain the clean sweep “A”s. Which is impossible for this 3rd semester. With 2 killer subjects, a research paper as well as a semester held in February-June (where March-May are the busiest months for Malaysian teachers!); it seems that my 3rd semester’s result is going down the abyss………………
But yes, of course; Tawakallah. And I am writing this to alleviate my angst. How irony is that I am revising on “Stress” and “Burn-out” in the organizational setting when I myself now is saturated with them! Whatever it is, God bless.
NOTIFICATION UPDATE :-
Alhamdulillah!!! My coursemate WhatsApp-ed me yesterday on 24th June 2015 saying that the grade for “Organizational Communication” was already out. I admit that I was nervous! I was so shocked! I didn’t expect to get an “A”!!! Alhamdulillah! It’s all down to Mak & Ayah’s prayer!
So, one killer subject is already known. What about the other killer subject (TPCC) and Principles of Advertising? Tawakallah. Although I don’t put high hope, especially for TPCC. Huhu…..